Have you heard something like this before…? “We can increase website traffic, clicks, calls, and revenue by putting your services and products in front of the eyes that matter to your business.” If you have been cold called or mailed in the last year about digital marketing, we bet you have… This claim usually has little to no substance behind it. Its Marketing bullshit at its best, or is it?

First, why listen to us? We have been helping small to medium-sized UK businesses since 2003 and working with international startups – global brands since 2012. We have built, run and sold successful businesses that deliver 6+7 figure profits and have helped grow 7+8 figure client businesses. It’s not all rosy though, we’ve had a couple of failures as well. Did you get it right the first time? Let us know.

Today we run a lean business model, no overpaid salaries or rip off consultants, only results-based pay for us mere head honchos. We don’t do overpriced fancy offices, no more company Porsches or driving Ferraris and no suits in sight. Thank god for that last one. If somebody in a suit is trying to sell you marketing services or advertising, run for your bloody life! The Porsche and Ferrari bit were fun but by god did it piss off a few customers from time to time! It was usually the ones that had a big boat to play on at the weekend. It’s funny how that works, don’t you think? Why is it people generally hate on others perceived success? Perception is not reality my friends. Think of the amount of Gucci wearing clones there is walking about our fine city of Glasgow at the weekend or any other town or city for that matter. Don’t even get us started on the monstrosity footwear donning the Balenciaga label. I’m sorry but what are they cheap looking moon boots all about lol? Your kidding no one! It’s just a bit of light-hearted banter so don’t get all irate and pop a vessel, we like our clobber as much as the next person : )

If you’re looking for corporate nodding dogs, sorry that’s not us. We are upfront and what you see is what you get. We only deliver real measurable results. We won’t try and sell you on something just to make that next monthly Lambo payment or to buy some hype nonsense. Seen it, done it, bought the supreme t-shirt, next! We are not about that life. We do what we do because we love it and we are good at it, not because we have to pay the bills. No fake facades or kissing ass here either. Did we mention we don’t mind the odd swear word? Not everybody’s cup of tea granted, but we are good with that. We both need to like each other to work together. This is our personality its who we are. Life is too short for bullshit. We are approachable, helpful, and fairly normal for the most part. Every good person needs a little bit of crazy in their life now and then : )

The truth is wanting to be a “Digital Agency” in 2019 is quite hot. Each month we get at least 1 startup agency or a sole trader approaching us for help with their customers Facebook Ads, Google Ads, Instagram Marketing, SEO or whatever ebook or online course they bought from a YouTuber claiming to enable them to be a successful agency overnight.

It is staggering how many self-professed “Agencies” and “entrepreneurs” are popping up these days, seems all you need to do is give yourself a title you like the sound of most. What will I be today? What about a “Digital Agency” or “Public Figure” or “Influencer” or “Entrepreneur”, aye that’s it, wantrepreneur will do just fine, but seriously kids it’s just not cool, so stop it for the love of God lol. In 6 months to 1 year, these profiles implode and become nothing more than ghosts. Why? There is no substance, positive results or the endless hard graft put in that is required to make a startup be in the running for survival never mind successful. Running a successful agency is bloody hard work. It consumes your life. Working into the wee hours and up early doors to do it all again. If you’re after that 4 hour work week, an agency is not for you. Pretending to work 40-60 hours per week whilst sipping lattes or mochas to fuel your creative efforts, come on… seriously? Stop playing. Agency life is a 24/7 gig. If you don’t love bloody long hours and sleepless nights get off the agency life bandwagon.

The fact is most new “agencies”, and we use that term very loosely, have been duped into buying a course filled with nothing more than false promises of a get rich quick scheme. The fakery promoting this drivel is out of control. Once the poor target realises they have been blinded by these god-like omnipresence “influencers”, who turn out to be nothing more than a bag of hot air, end up having their self-esteem crushed by the feeling of failure or worse they still believe the pitch and decide to slightly alter their course, so they jump on the trend of offering the same type of training to unsuspecting clients themselves lol. Seriously if someone is offering you training on doing your own social media or Ads please, please take a step back and ask for their past and current results, and references so you can do your own due diligence before going full steam ahead by onboarding some kids or some “agency” with delusions of grandeur. “Wait do we not offer training?”, “Oh, shit that’s right we do.” “Just delete that bit out then before posting.” “Oh, no wait, we are actually quite good at it are we no?” “Just leave it in then.” Ok, Kev!

The funnel process used by these “influencers” can look something like this, YouTube video or Facebook Ad consumed, retargeted via ads or pixel tracking until you progress down the funnel, some email nurturing for a webinar sign up (video can be gold for selling), then more automated nurturing via mail or messaging, eventually you click that call to action button on that optimised landing page to buy that ebook promising the grail, you get a little value from the ebook and your still hooked so you are retargeted further for up/cross-selling, more nurturing continues and you eventually buy that online coaching plan or one to one training, and on and on the cycle continues. Sound familiar? Its great isn’t it! The fact is, funnels work and optimising your sales + marketing funnel is the best way to grow your business. We know, its what we do for our clients. Its what we can do for you.

So what now? What about these “wantrepreneurs”? Well after their week-long hard work studying the ins and out of how to be a successful agency, they feel they are ready to take on the world and become the best digital agency to hit the face of the earth. Remember they did this all within a week. Right then! We remember that cheesy Scottish TV advert promoting job skills as well!

On a slightly more positive note, these courses aren’t a complete waste of time, that would be unfair to the author of the original script creator, that the latest self-confessed sales, social, agency, influencer or gurus are ripping off. The better ones do teach the basics of how to appointment generate albeit with a butchered script, then on to how to pitch the services in question, and finally how to close the deal. If you’re lucky they will introduce points from the free blueprints that are available on the platforms. Super! That makes it have value. Well done son : )

Sarcasm aside, these are great skills to have. Sales are at the heart of every business but beyond that, they are stuck on how to deliver what they are trying to peddle, or worse they will spend your hard-earned money on campaigns that will 9 times out of 10 fail simply because they just don’t know what the hell they are doing. This is getting more and more common within the digital marketing space in particular with social media offerings, usually Facebook Ads. Watch out for the sharks, its a bloodbath out there!

Building successful Ad campaigns time after time is not luck-based. It takes real marketing and advertising experience and lots of it. Nothing an ebook, web course or worse a College course or University Degree can teach you. College/University education for all disciplines digital is a waste of time. We have the degrees to prove it. Past and current curriculums are 90% useless and out of date. Colleges and Universities are dying that’s just a fact, and its nothing to do with fees, its that people are waking up to the fact they don’t need to be a graduate to get a good gig. Think about it, what can possibly be good about learning something over a 3-4 year period mixed in with a lot of useless nonsense to attempt to apply it in the real world 3-4 years later. Digital moves too fast. Unless you want to be something like a Doctor, Dentist, Lawyer… College/University is a waste of time and money. If you want to fulfill that dream of becoming Insta-famous for that filtered lifestyle chances are you have missed the boat on that by now. Impossible? No. Most can’t help it, they become more a product of their society each time they browse their IG fam. Go on do it for the gram! Build your tribe.

Do paid Ads work then? You hear people saying Facebook advertising doesn’t work, that they tried it or they had someone do ads for them and they didn’t get a return. Nonsense. The simple fact is Advertising works when done right, just like any form of marketing can. In the case of the naysayers, they did it wrong. Facebook and Googles Ad-based revenue doesn’t continue to grow to lofty heights for no reason. They are proven ad platforms. So yes, Paid Ads do work, but only when done right and when an optimised funnel is in place.

If you are not optimising your sales + marketing funnels (Learn more about funnels here) you are throwing money down the drain and leaving thousands of pounds, dollars, euros… for the taking each and every month for your competitors to mop up. Building a glossy website, paying for SEO, Google Ads and Facebook Ads in today’s competitive digital world without utilising optimised sales + marketing funnels is just crazy.

Why? The days of sending customers to a websites home page or product/service page in the hope your visitors call, book or buy something is dead. “But it works for me,” some say. That’s great, keep doing your thing mate : ) Just know your competition will be soaking up all your bleeding efforts, and when they eventually figure out how to pick off your client list one by one, they will.

How can you do better? Implement optimised funnels and leverage the platforms relevant to your digital strategy. You need to go paid. If we need an expert that’s what we seek out. Business growth is no joke so don’t be cheap. Good results cost good money. Organic is dead on social platforms and new organic reach is slowing down on search engines. Facebook, Instagram, Google, YouTube, LinkedIn are pay-to-play platforms, so you need to get your digital strategy right just now rather than later or it is going to cost you big time.

Already have someone running your ads? Great! But Ad campaigns can always perform better, that’s just a fact. Google Ads, Facebook Ads, Instagram Ads, YouTube Ads, LinkedIn Ads all work when done right. Granted they all don’t work equally for every business, but we know where your customers are and we know how to target them better. Squeeze the juice!

Money. People hide from this, but why? Without talking about it, its all bullshit. It comes down to how many eyeballs you need to be in front of. Buy in volume and get it cheaper can apply with marketing and advertising, so the question is not how much money you think you want to spend on digital marketing each month, but rather, how much extra money do you need or want to make each month. If you want/need to make 5000 more per month and if you have to spend 1000 or 2000 or even 3000 to get there it doesn’t matter. Profit is profit. You have to spend it to get it and you can always scale up. Spend more, get more until you cap out. Our pricing is transparent. Take a look here at our rates.

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